Aging When You Are Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, or Transgender

Daria Sawochka

It has been said that taking care of each other is nothing new for many same sex couples. After all, it was only 34 years ago that homosexuality was removed from the diagnostic manual. That means for a 70 year old today, she lived her first 36 years knowing the American Psychiatric Association believed who she was, who she loved and how she felt was medically wrong and she was suffering from a “disorder.”  Needless to say, suspicion of service providers and trust of “others” does not come easily for our LGBT elders. 

Families have also played a significant role in the lives of our elders, and often rejected members that were LGBT. Therefore, creating family among friends was paramount. For many elders, doing without seems preferable to opening up your home to strangers who may not agree with nor understand the LGBT life. A recent study reveals that less than one-quarter of today’s seniors utilize senior programs in the community. And it seems ironic that many hospice programs today modeled their system of care from insights gained and lessons learned from the LGBT community’s response to the devastating challenges that accompanied the AIDS epidemic of the 1980s. The question becomes how to address this deep-seated reluctance on the part of LGBT elders to accept help for their aging concerns. After all, as with all aging, the issue becomes not if we will need help at some point in the future, but when and to what degree.

LGBT elders also face challenges that many elders face today, such as affordable housing, ageism, and trying to live on fixed incomes as the cost of living soars. The latest catch phrase of “aging in place” really only applies to heterosexuals and will continue to exclude LGBT elders until the Social Security Administration and state Medicaid programs begin to recognize long-term partnerships in their provision of benefits.

So where do we go from here? As the LGBT Aging Project of Boston suggests, in the not-too-distant future, the first generation of very openly LGBT elders will enter “the system” and this has the potential to cause an extraordinary cultural clash, legal struggles and financial disasters for countless families, as well as service and employment issues for providers. 

The likely place to begin is here, where we live, in our community. You are invited to attend the First Pacific Northwest LGBT Forum on Aging on June 15-16,  2007 at the School of Social Work on the University of Washington campus in Seattle.  One day’s workshops are focused on health and social service providers who work to meet the needs facing the challenges of the older LGBT Community.  The second day is a day for everyone to join the conversation and participate in workshops around caring for the aging community. Both days will include workshops on important aging topics such as elder abuse, caregiving, housing, mental health, legal issues, and much more! There is even a night of entertainment, “Celebrating Coming of Age with Humor and Song,” featuring Holly Near, Bob Smith, and Karen Williams.  Mark your calendar and let’s explore meaningful ways to care for all our elders.                

The event is a community collaboration between more than ten organizations and individuals.  For more information, please contact Mo at Verbena at (206) 323.6540, ext.1 or email mo@verbenahealth.org.