Focusing on "Moms in the Middle"

by Lisa Cohen and Staff Writers

For the "Sandwich Generation," caring for one or more elder parents coincides with raising children, as well as with jobs and other responsibilities. What do "Moms in the Middle" want for Mother's Day? Some help...and some respite time!

In celebration of Older Americans Month and Mother's Day in May, the Eldercare Locator has partnered with the National Alliance for Caregiving to honor and raise awareness for millions of mothers throughout the country who care for an older adult while also raising children: "Moms in the Middle."

"The number of 'Moms in the Middle' is increasing every year, and in many cases these women not only play the role of moms and caregivers, but they are also employed," said Josefina G. Carbonell, Assistant Secretary for Aging at the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. According to a study titled "In the Middle" (see below), more than 4 out of 10 Americans between the ages of 45 and 55 are caring for a child and an older adult. Forty-four percent of these "Sandwich Generation" members have children under age 21, as well as living parents, in-laws, or both.

In addition to the public recognition aspect of the campaign, the Eldercare Locator and NAC have released a set of tips (below) to help "Moms in the Middle" manage their dual roles, including a list of helpful services that are available to assist them with their daily caregiving activities. The Eldercare Locator (1-800-677-1116, www.eldercare.gov) is the first step to get families connected to local programs that can help "Moms in the Middle," including adult daycare, financial assistance, home health services, home modification, personal care, and respite care.

"We want Moms in the Middle to learn about and use the many resources that are available to help make their lives a bit easier when juggling caregiving along with their other responsibilities," said Gail Hunt, Executive Director of the National Alliance for Caregiving. "We want them to take care of themselves by taking advantage of caregiver support groups, the range of aging-related community services, as well as the flexible work benefits offered by some employers."

Tips to Help "Moms In the Middle" Manage

• Celebrate yourself. Realize just how important you are. Taking good care of yourself first puts you in a better position to take care of others.
  
  
• Ask for help when you need it. Involving others to help you get the things done can make tasks less challenging and time consuming.
  
  
• Learn about and use community resources. Contacting the Eldercare Locator will help you identify programs that can offer a break for you while providing the necessary support for your older loved one.
  
  
• Take advantage of employer family-friendly programs. Understanding employer policies on personal leave, flex-time and working from home will provide additional options to handle caregiving duties.
  
  
• Manage your time. Making a list of things that you need to do for your elder, your child, and/or yourself will help you prioritize activities and gain control of your time.

Locally, the Caregiver Outreach and Support Program
through Senior Services of Seattle/King County offers resources and suggestions for local "Moms in the Middle."